The Post I Wasn’t Going to Write

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I wasn’t going to do one of these reflection posts.  I saw and read every one else’s and just didn’t want to do one.  I didn’t feel like going back through the 261 published posts and recapping what an awesome blogging year 2013 was for me.  Although it was a great year for me in general, for many different reasons…I just didn’t feel like recapping it.  Its almost like that term paper that you know you have to write, but don’t know where to start to so you wait till the last minute and burn the midnight oil getting it done.  Recapping 2013 was gonna take work, so much has happened, my brain is just too full. 

The snippets of time I get when my son is sleeping allows we to post most of my posts, but not one like this one.  I can’t focus, family just left, and Hubs is off today.  As I sit here and write this post, while my son sleeps and Hubs is getting ready to go work out, I’m still overwhelmed and don’t know where to start.  I’m a private girl, ironic huh, since I blog.  I love to share, more verbally though than physically.  I’m learning to be more open.  If I have one blogging goal for 2014, its to share more about myself on my blog.  Post more pictures, talk more about myself and everyday life, show and tell you what I’m really going through in my life right now.  I think a lot of the reason I’m like that is because of my military career.  There is certain information I can’t share, don’t want to share, and shouldn’t share.  One day though, I will share it.  At least what I can.

For now, I’ll tell you that I’m transitioning into a new role:  A Mom.  No not a working mom, or a military mom, but just a mom.  With that I’ll be a SAHM, yep that means no more military, no more work outside the home, and no more of my own income (except the pennies I receive from my blogging endeavors). I’ve shared here and there that after I had my son, that’d I be at home with him full time.  However, I never touched completely on the fact that I’d no longer have my career in doing so.  It’s a beyond than worthy sacrifice.  One to be honest I don’t have a lot of control over.  My time serving our nation is coming to an end soon, and its hard.  I’m tearing up as I write this, so I’ll change the subject.  I promise, I’ll share my story one day, all the good and bads (more bads than goods). 

Yes, 2013 was a wonderful year, in part because I moved back home (even though we’re still in the process of moving), which is something hubs and I really wanted to do.  We want to raise our son close to family and in our beloved South.  Hubs got a new job, so I go from being a military spouse, or rather a dual military household, to being a cops wife.  It’s a role I never saw myself in, and is scary.  More on that later though!  The most wonderful thing that happened for me in 2013 was the birth of my son.  My heart is so full of love and brain already so full of memories (and so is my phone and computer with pictures) that its hard for me to organize my thoughts on motherhood and having a child a lot of the times.  That’s another goal of mines in 2014, get a grasp of this thing called motherhood.

So even though this is the post that I didn’t want to write, I’m glad I did.  It was somewhat cathartic, which with it being the first day of a year, is exactly what I needed to do.  Sometimes its not about what we want to do, but what we need to do.

Again, Happy 2014!  Here’s to a great year a head of all of us!

xxoo,

7 thoughts on “The Post I Wasn’t Going to Write

  1. Aw, I love a good video! Look at that cutie. I love babies in overalls!! My son is now old enough to unsnap them and I miss when he’d keep them on.
    I really need to show myself more in my posts. I don’t post a lot of photos and videos of myself.
    Tamara recently posted…Just A Bit More Looking Back.

    • Thanks so much lady! I barely made it to get him in those things, lol! Its like one week they were too big and the next they were fitting quite snug. He might have one more good week in them before he grows out of them.

      I know exactly what you mean when you say you should feature more pictures of yourself. I falter in that area so much. In part, because I’m usually the one snapping the photos. I’m really going to try to better this year with it!

  2. Tenns, I am so excited to hear more about your story. So admirable of you to just be a mom. People underestimate what goes into doing that and being a good wife many many times. It’s the reason why I believe the divorce rate has gotten so high in our country :( . Your son is going to have such a wonderful childhood and I’m sure the sacrifice you are making to be a full time mom will show in his upbringing :) Happy New Year, girl! I hope you are enjoying each and every moment with your family xoxo
    Brittnei recently posted…Potty Training In 3 Days

    • Thanks so much Brittnei! I really appreciate the support. With each day that goes by, the realization of being just a mom has been a little hard to swallow. I always thought I’d love being a SAHM and nothing else, but it it definitely taking some time for me to transition and feel comfortable in the role. Thankfully, I can look to ladies like yourself as role models. And yes, I do agree that the flip side of the ‘working woman” has largely contributed to the country’s rising divorce rates.

      Happy New Year as well hun and I hope all is well with you and your little bean (and your big one too)! :-)

  3. Tenns! What an adorable video…Nicholas is a cutie-pie! I love his OOTD :D I can’t wait to see where you journey is taking you. I know that changes in life especially ones that have come upon us at times without all the choice being our own can be difficult. I also know that you are an amazing woman, mother, wife and BLOGGER! :D You have greatness in your path so get ready! xoxoxo
    Tiffany recently posted…2014 Blogger Challenge: LISTEN Inspiration

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