True Colors

Maya Angelou Quote

You meet people, like them, let your guard down and then what do they do:  show you their true colors.  I quote Maya Angelou when I say this “The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them.”  To me, this means when people really show you who they are.  Sometimes this is not the first time you meet them, or the after a month or year.  Sometimes, its after several months or years.  Its that moment when they wrong you.  You really learn people when they do something wrong to you.  If they apologize and you’re able to call it square, them usually they’re okay.  However, if they end up throwing a rock and hiding their hand, well then that tells you who they really are right there.  A liar is a liar is a liar.  You have to call it what it is. Continue reading

Thoughts from a preggo | Is there A Such Thing As A Mean Blogger

Is there such a thing as a mean blogger?? 

Since I like to keep my blog PG/PG-13, I will refrain from using other language to actually describe how I feel these individuals I may come across. As I was browsing through new blogs last night, deciding who I wanted to follow, I came across a very colorful blogger. I honestly do not remember the blog URL, and even if I did I would not put them on blast or link to them. I initially found this person’s blog through another bloggers link up party page. I clicked on the button and found myself at a “This page doesn’t exist” page. I was a little confused, since this rarely happens, so I decided to visit the rest of the blog. As I scrolled through the homepage, I came across a post that basically talked about why this particular blogger did not swap buttons or do link parties and such anymore. Now, I respect everyone’s decisions in regards to what they choose to do or not do with their blog. Personally, I think swapping buttons and link parties are a great way to network and connect in the blogging community, although not the only way. The thing that got me was not the subject matter of the post, but the coarse and rude language used throughout the post. I believe in not sugar-coating, trust me I’m a Marine, so nothing in my life gets sugar coated on a daily or regular basis. I like the facts straight and direct. However, this person seems agitated by some of the trends in the current blogging community, they seemed quite frankly p*ssed. This blogger went on to say that they would no longer swap buttons, because all they want is money from blogging, specifically your money. Additionally, that if you are going to advertise for her on your blog then she should be paying you, which she is not in the business of doing. This blogger trashed link parties saying that the number of link parties out there is ridiculous and why follow a blog if all their blogging consists of is link parties every day. Now, I’m the first to say that I love link parties. I think they are fun, and they are also very new to me. Back when I started beauty and fashion blogging, over 5 years ago there was no such device to use to link several related posts or blogs. I do have to admit that I participate in many, but not solely to put my posts out there, but to mainly find new blogs and material to read.

As a blogger, you mainly focus on your blog. Well, we all know you have to give to receive and pay it forward. I have found so many good blogs through link parties, guest posts, and Pinterest and I’m glad I have. Back in the day there were all these “blogger community websites” like Ning that bloggers would sign up on. I’m pretty sure they are still around, but I’m not trying to be a part of hundreds of these communities, because I loathe having to create yet another username and password for another site. I already have too many! On to the subject of money, I was really taken aback by this bloggers overly direct way of making it as if everyone in the blogging community does it for money or that’s the only thing they really care about. Its no secret, many make money blogging, just the same as many don’t. New Mama Diaries is a very new blog barely two months old, so I have not and do not expect to make a month’s salary from it at this time. That is not my focus for this blog.

New Mama Diaries is an outlet for me to be able to express who I am and chronicle this point in my life. That is not to say that I would turn down an opportunity to be sponsored. Blogging is like a part-time job, I spend at least 4 hours + it every day, and that doesn’t count the numerous times throughout the day that I’m thinking of new topics to post on. I can definitely understand why many use blogging as an opportunity to draw income, but I have a hard time believing that the bulk of the community does it solely for the money. I’m pretty selective when it comes down to the blogs I follow. I only follow blogs that I feel I can relate to. I look at everything from the posts content, to the layout, and of course the actual blogger. If I don’t immediately get the warm and fuzzies, I simply don’t follow or link up. I also follow every single blog that I choose to link up on. It’s a way of paying it forward and for me to keep track of who I link up with. I don’t mind someone grabbing my button and wanting to feature me on their site, that’s why the button is there. What I would have a problem with is a blog that I do not support, meaning if the blog contains inappropriate content or a cause that I don’t support, having my button or being to linked to my blog in some way.

Nonetheless, the point I’m making is not to down other bloggers for the methods and techniques they use to acquire more readership and followers, which is what I felt this particular blogger did. In addition to the rude language they used, I realized that this person’s blog was overall offensive and I would never follow a blogger who posted such derogatory posts under the cover of “not sugar coating” or “being real”. You can be real, honest, and not sugar coat and still do it respectfully. So despite the fact that this blogger may have some good content on their site, the overall feel of the blog is negative and cynical. Almost like a “mean girl”. Actually you know what that’s exactly what it felt like reading through the post. Another thing that bothered me was the fact that this blogger had managed to influence other bloggers to follow suite. In the comments I read that one blogger had already contacted another blog asking to be removed from their blogroll. Why would you just now be asking to be removed or even agree to link up or be on someone’s blogroll if you didn’t feel comfortable or like them in the first place? I do not maintain a blogroll, because number 1) they are too much maintenance. It’s already enough to maintain a link party page, every other button, badge, and html coded thing on my blog, post, and make sure the formatting for everything looks neat and clean, which is always a work in progress 2) if I want to link up or display someone’s blog, I’d rather post a button 3) I don’t feel the need to express to every single one of my followers/readers every single blog I read 4) I would not want to make anyone feel left out or like it’s a popularity contest to be featured on my blogroll.  This particular blogger made it as if it was a privilege to be featured on their blogroll, since they no longer did link parties or button swaps. To me that shows me that they are not willing to give back or pay it forward. I tried to be as objective as possible in reading the post and could see on some levels where the blogger was coming from, and again this was not the issue.

The issue was the lack of regard for other bloggers and readers who might use link parties regularly, do button swaps, and generally enjoy blogging just to blog, not solely to make money. I think any blog that comes across as only being in the business of making money is off-putting. No one wants to feel as if they’re being scammed or targeted to buy or support something when visiting a blog or website. And yes, I do understand the nature of this free enterprise, ingenuous country (the USA) that I live it. Its capitalism at its best, but are there no values or goodness anymore?

What do you think? What is your taking on the blogging community that you’re a part of? What would you do if you came across a rude or insulting post on a blog?

Happy bumping!


Thoughts from a preggo

I recently read a post on Facebook from another preggo that asked who was not fully convinced that there is a baby coming.  I have gone over this thought in my head since I found out I was pregnant.  While pregnancy is so absolutely tangible, on the other hand it isn’t.  Even at 6 months pregnant and clearly showing, I still have a hard time grasping the fact that there is actually a life inside of me growing, and that one day (well in 16ish weeks) it’s going to come out and be its own little person.  This little person will grow into a child, then teenager, then adult!  That is just beyond fascinating to me.  I feel the baby move all the time, so I rationally know that it’s in there…it’s just hard to believe that its actually in there, lol!  I wonder who this little person is, what they are doing (besides floating around in water and sleeping), what they are thinking about, what they will look like, and just everything I can possibly think and want to know about someone. 
This someone is mine and my husband’s though and that is extremely special.  There is no other feeling in the world than to know you have created life out of love.  My husband and I often joke about how crazy this kid will be, because we know how we are.  I fully expect to have a super active kid with a big personality.  We have the added mystery of not knowing what baby is, because we have decided to stay TEAM GREEN!  I’m 6 months down with just 3 to go and that seems like such a short amount of time left.  I cannot believe how fast this time has gone by and before I know it, a little precious baby will be in my arms and not in my belly.

Just thought to share these thoughts with you and give you some insight into how I feel about being pregnant. 

If you have been pregnant, did you feel the same way? 
Experience anything different??

I’d love to know!
Happy Bumping!